Oh Taste and See

gaillovesgodspoetry

Rain trickles down the window pane.
The glass reveals the storm.
The misty clouds drop their blessings
Where the dry ground began to form.
The flowers tilt underneath the weight
Of the life giving moisture,
Yet when the rays of life return
They will regain their posture.
Birds are hidden away for shelter,
Some tucked underneath their set of wings.
Their bird baths are being generously filled,
And soon they will again sing.
The children run and play in the puddles,
And tilt their heads back to taste and see
Oh how good and faithful
The Lord is to you and me.

1.30.2020 Thursday
Written by Gail Brookshire
Inspiration: Psalm 34:8
“O taste and see that the Lord is good: blessed is the man that trusteth in him.”

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Convalesce

Lord, I need Your help in getting a note typed up for my dear friends who are so kind to check in on me, even sending loving comments.  I keep trying to get a chance to write about things as they happen, but I am STILL struggling with feeling so easily wiped.

Convalesce… that was the word You gave me when I got to sick back in November.  I was sick the whole month. I was wiped… and still am. Thank You for healing me from the sinus infection. I know You will help me to continue to heal.

Webster says Convalesce is to heal and grow strong. I clearly hear You telling to come away and convalesce with You by resting in trusting You… and growing strong in Your word.. in Your strength… in You!

This most recent doctor visit with my podiatrist was not encouraging. There was the good news of no break (Praise Your Holy Name!), but she says that the stress is trying to cause enough pressure on my bones to cause a fracture, and the neuroma I’ve had since 1992 is being effected, but she says that it’s my back causing the problems. Because of that she says she cannot treat my foot because it may injure my back worse.

It is so challenging, Lord! I am supposed to be elevating my legs as much as possible to relieve the lymphedema and lipedema by getting the fluid off, yet I cannot elevate my legs as I should because my back will not tolerate my laying back like that for more than 15 or 20 minutes without severe pain, or causing me  not to be able to lift my legs. I have to drag them to get up. MY physical therapists have long wanted to help me with different exercises and treatments that I am unable to do because of this. The weight from the fluid on my legs make it heavier and harder on my back. And from sitting so much, I struggle to keep good circulation and other problems. I feel defeated.

I am blessed that You give me so many loving friends. I am touched more than they know by each word. I long to get opportunities to respond back, to thank, and to read how things are going with them, and encourage for them as I pray. Even as I type this, I am struggling to stay awake. So please let them know only the way YOU can, how much they mean to me! And that I am praying for them!.

**Thank you to each one of you who have been so kind to leave encouraging messages, smiles, and the posts you may not know I do read. Sometimes I get a LIKE on it before I lose it or fall asleep. Sometimes I don’t. Regardless, I am praying for each one of you! Each One!! Me and God love you!!! ❤ **

PS… God allowed me to write a small poem Convalesce In His Rest.
This is the message He has given me for now, and the coming year. This is the word.. the command… the whisper He has made so clear. I need to come away with Him and rest… physically, spiritually, mentally, psychology, and every way possible! I AM WIPED!
But By His grace, in His strength, and according to His will and perfect timing I will grow stronger.

Thank you for every one who has prayed, and continues to!
They make the difference!

Thank You, Jesus, for Your faithful presence, healing touch, spring of hope,
and Your wonderful matchless grace!

GIFTS of the King

Life is such a GIFT,
and Lord allowed today’s gift to be a very blessed one!
Thank You, My King, for Your gift of love in each day. ❤

Time is a GIFT.
Whether it be a lifetime with loved ones,
or a brief visit with a loved ones,
time is such a beautiful thing.
Yet God tells us when we get to heaven,
there will be no more time….
cause we will be with our loved ones
(which includes him)
FOREVER ❤
Praise you, Lord my Manger King!

Persuaded By Love

gaillovesgodspoetry

Persuaded by love, I live.
I accept and cherish all He has to give.
Day by day, I will trust
That He will be my strength to do what I must.
Night after night, I will cling to Him,
Remembering many hurting souls need to know He loves them.
Life is challenging, but worth the breath.
We should live to honor His death.
Every moment is a treasured gift.
We are here to love, save, and lift.
Thank You, God, for mercy and grace,
And for teaching us Your loving ways.
Thank You for being new every day,
And leading us all along the way.
Thank You for never giving up on us,
And sending Your precious Jesus.

7-12-2019 Friday
Written by Gail Brookshire

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You Carry Me

gaillovesgodspoetry

Drawn to everything about You,
I seek to read Your word.
I listen for everything about You.
I cherish all I’ve heard.
Taking You with me inside,
I venture back into life.
I am trusting every promise
To see me through my strife.
Through each challenge arising,
I see You in every way.
You are carrying me
Through each and every day.
As the evening approaches
And the night settles in,
I have found I made it
Carrying You within.
As I lay my head down
And close my eyes to the night,
I trust in the rest You send.
Sweet dreams and goodnight.

7-9-15 written by Gail Brookshire

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Striving Among the Strife

gaillovesgodspoetry

Striving for You
in a world striving against You,
in a world striving against anyone
who strives for You.
Striving to love one another
in a world that doesn’t love You,
yet You loved them anyway,
and still do.
Striving to obey Your law
by obeying the law of man,
when their law goes against You
and all who would dare to stand.
Striving for peace
in a world filled with hate.
Their love confuses them
because Yours is up for debate.
Trusting in Your will
when Your will is not ours,
when evil seems to be given
unthinkable powers.
To doubt or fear
is to judge You in haste.
There is not a moment of life
that You waste.

7-10-15 written by Gail Brookshire

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Lost Testimony

gaillovesgodspoetry

Years of ministry, marriage, and testimony
gone in a heated moment.
Years of discipline and faithfulness
completely stolen.
Stolen from a loving Savior
who will forgive even this transgressor,
yet it will be thrown in His face
by the aggressor.
Oh moments of guilt and shame
do occasion,
but they are always trumped
by persistent temptation.
How hard for those
who drew from their strength
to witness the weakness,
near or at length.
Yet how devastating
for a Savior who died
to now live and wait
for those who have defied.

7-16-15 written by Gail Brookshire

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Compassion for Invisible Disability

This post and video from a fellow blogger friend speaks so well on its own that I hate writing anything, but I need you to know I did not write this. Krissy’s video has many statements I have said or thought myself… and more. My own answer when I saw this was An invisible disability is… Cruel! What would yours be? This is a safe place to be honest with your answer. God loves you and knows your heart… and your trials.

Musings of a wounded healer

During invisible disability week I asked our amazing online community to complete the sentence, An invisible disability is…, as part of my ongoing sentence completion project.

Hearing people’s responses and putting them together into this video has really touched my heart personally and professionally. 💚

I think it is something we can all relate to as we become more aware of the different experiences we are all touched by, either directly, through those we love and our communities.

A VIDEO OF OUR ONLINE COMMUNITY REFLECTION:

An invisible disability is…

A list of everybody’s responses:

An invisible disability is very lonely.

An invisible disability is a daily struggle.

An invisible disability is not believed.

An invisible disability is frustrating.

An invisible disability is exhausting. Just because I look OK doesn’t mean I feel OK.

An invisible disability is tiring and not something I can just ‘get over’. It’s my life.

An…

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Off Day

Lord, You sure have given me a very off day. You know what I mean.
I think of that line from the John Wayne movie McLintock:

Camille to George McLintock: “Day off?”
George McLintock to Camille: “Off day!”

That’s the way everything felt about this day… OFF!
In the beginning that was the problem, by the end that is the wonder.

I had awakened after an hour or so of sleep with the feeling of oversleeping. I looked at the clock to see I had EXACTLY the amount of time needed to put on my shoes, grab my purse and keys, and race to the first of two appointments today.

The first one I so desperately needed answers and healing to pain. My doctors too were so hopeful, and I knew this doctor was the best in his field. You had blessed me with him twice before, three counting the time he came out in the middle of surgery to let me know that he and his colleague had seen my son definitely had bone cancer, but my son’s doctor was determined to wait for all pathology before a second surgery to determine just how much to cut out. His wait proved to be essential as the pathology showed no cancer, but instead a very unusual fracture.

My son and I were so fond of this doctor, and he had once been so fond of my son because he wrote the doctor a note of thanks for saving his hand. The doctor had mentioned how it touched him and his wife, so they kept it at home where they could see it for daily inspiration. I felt so hopeful about this appointment.

First my stomach would not let me leave without visiting the bathroom.
Then I had issues with my sock, then with the keys, then with a cat was right under the tire moving… s.l.o.w.l.y.! Then as I drove over the local bridge, I saw the Interstate was backed up! Oh no! I started praying taking the back road to the other Interstate would be OK. An industrial truck took a very s.l.o.w pace in front of me before I could find out, so I called the doctor’s office to let them know.
Praise Your name it was moving, but just as I got to my exit it was backed up again.

I made it to the parking lot only to realize it had been so many years that I went to the wrong building. I found it up the hill. I was just about to park when a car backed out of his space right in front of me without looking, causing me to make a very sharp brake. I slid forward toward the steering wheel, as I had just unlatched the seat belt to save me time when getting out of the car. Whew!
I was 10 minutes late, but they were so wonderful.
They were getting a lot of calls about the backups.

I did my paperwork, gave the insurance cards, and took the brief moment between to take a deep breath. My body was reacting to the stress, so I was trying to relax a little to relive some pain. My wait was not long at all. I followed my nurse into the room, answered questions, and waited for my doctor, who was also a dear friend.

The delightful greetings were at least as I thought it would be, but I was so shocked… disappointed… devastated! Not in the doctor… but the answer… or lack thereof. There was nothing he could do. He saw the problem is real… it may get worse… but there was nothing he could do. I was in such disbelief. He could see I was upset. I told him it wasn’t him, but that it had been so painful, and that if he couldn’t help me then no one could. I knew he was the best in his field. He appreciated that and felt bad, but literally didn’t even suggest a brace, a bandage, therapy, ice, heat… NOTHING.

I mentioned to him that the urgent care doctor had said when she saw no break on the x-rays they took that he could read them better, and would want to do a MRI or better imaging if it wasn’t just bone. She was concerned about Osteoarthritis being the problem (which I confirmed to her I have) and strongly urged me to see him. He said if they saw nothing then it just wasn’t there, and that he could tell I had OA, but didn’t believe this was the problem. “But I need to be able to use my hand!” “I’m sorry.”

This was so devastating it was all I could do not to cry. Part of me started to, but anytime I cry at a doctor’s appointment or anything medical I get the “anxiety” label and treatment. You know… where all of a sudden I’m treated like I’m either having a nervous breakdown, acting childish, overreacting, paranoid, just don’t understand, and am being irrational all because I allow my fear, my tear, or my concern being out in the open. This helped me hold off till I got to the car. Even then I could feel my body wanting to express this moment out loud, but my brain wasn’t having it.

I stopped at the post office box afterwards, and found a jury summons. Federal court this time. So I drove to a local chick-fil-A to put something on my stomach while doing my devotions. Uh oh. Tablet and phone need a charge. I get inside and realize I left my writing compo in car. So many little things could make one scream, but I said a prayer on the way to CFA.
“Ok., Lord. What do YOU want to do with this day? This is YOUR day. I am where YOU want me. What do YOU want from me?”

Joy starts coming over me as everywhere I look and see little smiles and waves keep coming at me. They keep coming from the playground, the table in front me, behind me, beside me, and walking by. They’re all too little to have been influenced by someone to raise their hand, or fake a smile. Everyone is noticing, and are tickled by it.
This would be my joy for the day!

The stress from the first appointment was adding to the stress of the later appointment before even arriving to the second one. An appointment that I dreaded. Not because I was dreading my doctor or the visit, but because he had discussed what to expect. I knew it would involve being extremely uncomfortable. The pressure was necessary to work through things. I was dreading dealing with that pressure so much that I was stressing myself with fear of frustrating or aggravating my doctor.

I still had a couple of hours in between, so I THOUGHT I would catch my breath. I get in the car and realize a bird has “hit” my window. It is over 80 degrees out, but I know NOT to roll down that window as I see there are two spots side by side, and streaked down the window to just inside the door.  I need to get gas as well, so I go to the local grocery store that has a gas station and car wash. I waited in line behind the other cars for over an hour, but I finally get the wash.

Pulling out, I notice it has not touched the stain! So I pull over to the gas pump to grab the window squeegee. I am trying to scrub, but the stain isn’t budging and my hand is not working. It hurts! But it’s not wasting its time on something that seems to have no hope. I suddenly have a feeling this stain might be on the inside! Don’t roll the window down! I drive on to the pharmacy to get my meds and pick up a bottle of Lysol Wipes with the scrubber one side and wiper on the other. Sure enough it was on the inside!! How did that bird hit inside a closed window, leaving a double stain that started in the MIDDLE of the window?!?

I realize by this time, I might as well go on over to this dreaded appointment before anything else happens to keep me from it. I make it with a little time to at least catch my breath. Now You are ready to allow me to attempt that! 😉 I pray, and gain the motivation to go on in!

Pleasant greetings are exchanged. Some joking about a chair in the lobby. And before long we are discussing my homework, how I am doing, and where to begin. I am offered, even encouraged, to make a decision. I am afraid to do so because I am afraid of making the wrong choice. I am afraid of frustrating my doctor. I attempt to follow his direction. Then as I expected it was time to avoid the very subject which needed addressing. I try to at least be honest that I am doing so, with the conveyance that I DO want to do what needs to be done. Reluctant trust shows up, but at least it some form of trust, enough to keep moving in the needed direction.

The very uncomfortable process keeps moving forward. I am soon so focused on the surprising result not being as I expected that my focus shifts to enduring even more to convince my brain… “Yes. I am doing this. I don’t know why it is not as I expected, but isn’t it more important that there is accomplishment in some manner? Isn’t it more important that I do what helps my doctor help me? Isn’t it a load off to know there is no point in carrying that load? I know your fear that the process isn’t over and the meat of the discomfort will show up. But can’t we just save our energy for dealing with it when… IF it comes? Maybe we’re wrong in thinking it HAS to be the result we expect. Maybe when the doctor says it’s OK and that we are doing well, shouldn’t we trust him to know what he’s talking about? Shouldn’t we at least focus on what is happening versus what is not happening? I could really use a break from all of this stress!”

The appointment comes to an end and I am in complete disbelief again. This time I am too afraid to believe how well things seem to have went compared to how I had feared. The dread had been replaced by comfort. The process had led to trust. The trust had brought an unexpected result. We still have much to work on, but the dreaded unknown had been put to light. The light had exposed the shadow of fear. Letting the doctor guide my treatment allowed at least a hopeful start in healing.

And isn’t that what makes it all more bearable… hope.
Isn’t that what made this day so off?
Where hope was expected to heal… it failed to even show up.
Where hope wasn’t even seen to be possible…
it was the very thing that made anything possible.
If hope is the evidence of things unseen, how did this happen?

“Now faith is the substance of things hoped for,
the evidence of things not seen.”
Hebrews 11:1 KJV

I’m still trying to figure all of this out because it just seems so off that where I had faith, hope was taken from me,
and where I was too focused on fear to trust, hope was given birth.
Is it possible that being I was given no counsel on possibilities for healing that my faith was not given the chance to be exercised?
Yet because I was given the chance, even encouraged, to trust… that my faith was exercised and hope given birth?
One thing I know for sure.
You my Creator, my Great Physician, Counselor, Almighty God, gave me a very off day… at least from my feeble human mind.
Lesson learned…. give You the chance to offer me to trust… have faith that You know best… and that whatever You lead me to, You will lead me through.
All my hope is in You!

Thanking God for Failed Relationships

Lord, thank You, for failed relationships!
I know You know what I mean and why I say that.
For as long as things have gone wrong,
You knew exactly where I was at.
From molestation as early as I can remember
(which happens to be three),
to things a child just shouldn’t know,
and neither should a teen.
From dating before I even “became a woman”
to “becoming a woman” with a man,
nothing has been hidden from You,
and by Your grace You’ve held my hand.
—–
So it makes sense that it would take so many failed relationships
to bring me peace in a relationship just with You,
a relationship that cares about my body and spirit,
willing to make my life brand new.
If any of those relationships had succeeded,
I would have never known the peace
in having 1 year of life without anything to do with touch.
The filth would have never ceased.
Being in a wrong relationship only allowed me
to focus on pleasing someone else instead of You,
or maybe enjoy someone saying what made me feel good,
instead of knowing what the Holy Spirit could do.
—–
While I do pray for each one of those souls,
I thank You earnestly for the failure each had.
Thank You for loving me enough to save me for Yourself,
for only wanting good for me, not any bad.
Thank You for allowing failure to be my rescue
of what would only get worse if allowed to last.
Thank You for the years that have brought peace
from the guilt and shame of that past.
Thank You for showing me purity from YOUR eyes,
as mine just could not see.
Thank You for sparing me of a miserable life,
and finding it special to spend a Holy one with me.

1-31-12 Written by Gail Brookshire
(by the grace of God)

“NEW” Series, #3 Graduating

Lord, You have made me a new graduate! 🙂 Praise Your Holy name! You helped me to complete the Diabetes Prevention Class that my regular doctor referred me for last year.

IMG_20180110_120243

 

It was a new program through our local hospital. Our group was literally the first class. We were given very nice scales, a pedometer, food journals, and a large binder with paperwork for the classes we had once a month.

 

 

Most importantly and most valuable, we were given a personal dietitian coach that saw us on scheduled appointments, scheduled phone calls,  and made us welcome to call them any time. “Lacey” was my coach. She showed compassion in sharing her advice, mercy in rearranging phone calls, and patience in listening to me ramble on. God definitely made her the most valuable encouragement from this program.

“Thank you, “Lacey!” I am grateful to God for you! Praying for you! God loves you!”

dcstacy

You helped me to attend each class! This can be challenging with four of us sharing a vehicle, and my unreliable health. You allowed me to learn more on food labels, food journals, better eating habits, better food choices, realistic goals, my liquid intake, and even not being so hard on myself. During this program, You helped our whole family develop better eating habits and better choices. And I still have my binder to refer to for the information that we learned along the way.

 

 

Along the way, I learned my skipping breakfast and sometimes lunch too was not helping my body at all. It was challenging getting used to eating so early, especially since I don’t really like most breakfast foods. The majority of it is greasy. Cereal was how I began my day. I learned to pay better attention to a menu when we had to eat out. I learned you can order an individual egg by itself… and did. My most eye opening information for myself was learning that I do not drink enough liquid. Oh yeah, I was drinking more water than anything else, but whatever I drank I nursed it.

Lastly is that piece of paper…..

IMG_20180110_120735

This piece of paper is validation that I do care about my health… that I am dedicated to working hard on preventing my body from developing diabetes. My doctors can know that I am not just laying around. While I would love to show it to each of my doctors, it is enough for me to know for myself that I actually finished something… by following You, and trusting you with what seemed pointless.

❤ THANK YOU, LORD! MY GREAT PHYSICIAN! ❤

“NEW” Series, Introduction

“Behold, I will do a new thing; now it shall spring forth; shall ye not know it?
I will even make a way in the wilderness, and rivers in the desert.”
 – Isaiah 43:19 KJV

Lord, here we are… finally getting around to this “NEW” series You whispered into my ear in December to begin in January. Not necessarily to celebrate a New Year or as a resolution. But to give glory to You for new things… new blessings that You have sent my way… and will be sending yet. I have so much to thank You for… including this new year of life. Thank You for helping me to Choose Life and to continue to Look Up. ❤

Just coming into this week was challenging. On New Year’s Eve, unpredicted layers of black ice froze the roads over so quickly that the roads looked normal and clear. Though cars and people were unable to drive or walk without accidents, the radar was showing nothing. Two tractor trailers jackknifed making it 7 hours before my brother, brother-in-law, and family friend got off the local interstate. During that time, when the car idled the heat did not work. After getting off and getting gas, the car wouldn’t go into gear from idling in the cold so long. It took another 4 or 5 hours to get a tow and home.

During that time, our heat went out. We have propane heat, and a wood stove for back up, but the furnace stopped and we ran out of wood and coal. It took the week to get the furnace working, the ice out of the gas tank regulator, some wood and coal for the stove, as well as get the hot water back. So many souls You sent. And that stranger that said, “It’s a God thing. Don’t ask questions.” May You bless each one so richly!

During this whole time, You had so many WordPress friends praying and sending encouraging messages when they didn’t even know what was going on. How much their prayers were needed… and heard… and answered! Thank You for each one!

So what has the new year brought so far? New challenges, of course! Anyone who thinks they will be without struggles, falls, challenges (of a negative nature), or no problems at all are setting themselves up for that inevitable discouragement that follows an unrealistic outlook. But it also brought new reasons to pray, to exercise faith, to witness to strangers, to meet new fellow believers, to see that there are still people who do good.

Thank You for fixing the furnace, hot water heater, gas regulator, for wood and coal, names of reliable sources for the future, new friends, and a renewed sense of family seeing things through together. Thank You for safety. Thank You for the driver who towed family off the roads. I have so many praises to give You that I’m sure I’ll fail to remember them all. Likewise, I have many people to pray over. But I can trust You with each prayer and praise. Your answered prayers and mercies are new every morning.

I also trust You to help me remember those things that You had laid on my heart to include in this “NEW” Series. It’s not to be just January. Your newness in our lives is ongoing. Whenever You lead, I will thank and praise. So let’s get started because as the song says, “I’ve got so much to thank [You] for.” ❤

Gifts 2017 #7 Friendship

Christmas Countdown: God gave me the gift of Seeds of friendship. So thankful for His planting them into my life. Whether they be neighbors, church friends, childhood friends, work friends, school friends, college friends, family friends, friends from being known as someone’s mom, Jaycee friends, Facebook friends, of the blessed community of WordPress friends… or even just as beautiful friends in Christ… I am blessed with each one. Even my friends in heaven… who give me reason and hope for heaven! ❤

“Greater love hath no man than this,
that a man lay down his life for his friends.”
– John 15:13 KJV

That would be our best friend Jesus! ❤

Gifts 2017 #4 Family, Heaven, Technology

Christmas Countdown: Family is a gift. As we have lost so many, it makes each one still here a gift. I thank God for my sister Sandra, my son Anthoni, my brother Nathan Brookshire, my brother-in-law Tim, my stepdad Bobby, my uncles, my aunts, and of all my cousins, and that includes adopted, foster, and in-laws. I will be tagging you each that I can on FB. The most important thing we learn from family is we do not choose them. God does. God wants us to know it’s ALL about being His children, and trusting in God the Father, His precious Son Jesus, and the Holy Spirit. We are ALL family in Him. THANK YOU, GOD ❤ for family!!

Heaven is a gift. Heaven is not just a place that awaits us, but it holds some of the people whom we love and miss so dearly! We have family, friends, church family, and so many more safely in the arms of the One Christmas is all about. We will meet that special Someone some day, and His Dad! And just think… all of those He used US to either lead to salvation or encourage in some way will be there too! Then one final Christmas day, WE will receive our gift of entering Heaven, and taking up residence in the home He went away to prepare for us! ❤

Technology is a GIFT: It may seem trivial to say this, but by the grace of God there is so much that can be done through technology: listening to audio-bibles, sermons, hymns, Christian radio, Christian Christmas music, encouraging others, praying for others, watching a plane fly across the country to keep up with loved ones making it safely home, using Google maps to help someone lost while on cellphone, and so much more, including this moment of being able to praise my Lord before the world! ❤ Love you, Father! ❤ Love you, Jesus! ❤ Love you, Holy Ghost! ❤