Hanging On While Slipping Away

Hanging on while slipping away,
it’s getting harder every day to stay.
My mind is losing its knowhow.
How long before I forget what’s now?
My tongue betrays my brain,
making it pointless to explain.
I err in speech and get lost in thought.
I say things I shouldn’t and don’t know what I ought.
Every day steals more and more of me.
Though I’m fighting, I just can’t flee.
All my life I’ve had to fight
to get others to believe I strive to do right,
or even just to believe my words.
They will abandon what can’t be heard.
Oh God my Lord most precious of all,
is this how I was to live my call?
I pray I did not waste time
or deserve this fate of mine.
I’ll cling to Jesus who suffered too
despite the fact He lived so true.

9-24-11 Written by Gail Brookshire
(by the grace of God)
Apparently, my neurological battle affecting my mental health has been going on longer than I remembered. Thank you, Jesus, for using the very words you gave me to choose to cling to you then, for encouraging me to keep fighting the good fight now! You are fully aware of my enemies, and my weaknesses! If anyone understands physical challenges, it’s You! ❤ You had a pretty good fight of your own! 😦

The Evangelistic Well

Preachers study so hard
to bring us God’s word.
Had he not been faithful,
we would’ve never heard.
Ministers serve so many
ministering to their church.
The faithful serving
helps heal the hurt.
Evangelists travel to tell
Jesus wants no one in hell.
Thank God for the evangelist
who shared from the well.

9-21-11 Written by Gail Brookshire
(by the grace of God)

Love of my Life – I am His Song – Guest post by Gail

Fellow Bloggers, LeneinJapan was so kind to invite me to guest write on her blog Song of Virginity. The Lord allowed me to share my testimony… His testimony in my life, here in this post. Lene celebrates and encourages choosing Christ first through abstinence, and she does it with a loving and nonjudgmental heart. She also has her own site… Wrestling with Faith – Dancing with Jesus. A place to find blessing and inspiration, and her own testimony.

Song of Virginity

Miss Gail from Gail loves God was kind – and courageous – enough to share a part of her story and it’s an honor for Song of Virginity to have her onboard. Read and marvel as Gail chose to trust the words of her Savior, rather than words of man… And when you’re done reading here, jump over to her blog and indulge in her poetry, singing from the depths of her heart to her Jesus.

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Song of Virginity… that sounds so beautiful… in its purest and godliest form. It easily makes me wish I had a song of virginity. A song that says I have always belonged to the Lord and the Lord only. That nothing has ever come between me and my Lord.
Unfortunately, I was without a song of virginity from the age of 3. I was 12 before I heard the word, and in…

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Spiritual Warfare on Medication: Response

Lord! You never cease to amaze me! You continue to delightfully surprise and reassure me! First, you surprised me with Lene (aka LeneinJapan) posting the article Love of my Life – I am His Song that she invited me to quest write on her website Song of Virginity.

Then, after I was talking with you last night about being weak with fear and uncertainty, doubtful of your peace with my brain being medicated. In my post Spiritual Warfare on Medication, I was afraid I made you look bad for my fear to paralyze me regardless of medication, and even while I am your child. I was so concerned you were upset with me, or at least disappointed. Yet by your grace and in your strength, I chose to look to you and trust your promises of unfailing love. I fell asleep listening to your word in song, and I awakened to such a beautiful and loving response! ❤

RELAX IN MY EVERLASTING ARMS. Your weakness is an opportunity to grow strong in awareness of My Almighty Presence. When your energy fails you, do not look inward and lament the lack you find there. Look to Me and My sufficiency; rejoice in My radiant riches that are abundantly available to help you.
Go gently through this day, leaning on Me and enjoying My Presence. Thank Me for your neediness, which is building trust-bonds between us. If you look back on your journey thus far, you can see that days of extreme weakness have been some of your most precious times. Memories of these days are richly interwoven with golden strands of My intimate Presence.”
Jesus Calling: Enjoying Peace in His Presence, September 27, p.282

You are not disappointed! You do not scold! You lovingly instruct me, and assure me I did right by turning my eyes upon you! You tenderly tell me relax  by Leaning on Your Everlasting Arms! ❤

The eternal God is thy refuge,
and underneath are the everlasting arms:
and he shall thrust out the enemy from before thee;
and shall say, Destroy them.
– Deuteronomy 33:27 KJV

You tell me my weakness and failing energy are opportunities for me to be aware of your presence. You tell me instead of lamenting on what I lack to rejoice in your abundant riches that are available to help! Those riches are my doctors! My medication! Therapy! And of course, your presence! Your strength!

You tell me to thank you for my neediness because it builds trust between us. Thank you for thinking I am worth spending that time with and sharing trust, even in weakness. You are right that it has been in my days of extreme weakness that I have had some of the most precious times with you!  Your word tells me that when I do not know understand my fear, nor know what to pray that the Holy Spirit in praying on my behalf.

Likewise the Spirit also helpeth our infirmities: for we know not what we should pray for as we ought: but the Spirit itself maketh intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered. – Romans 8:26 KJV

You tell me you know how I felt hopeless without you, and that I was wise to keep circling my problem as Joshua did the wall of Jericho, and wise to wait upon you.

I had fainted, unless I had believed to see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait on the Lord: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart:
wait, I say, on the Lord. – Psalm 27:13-14 KJV

Thank you for being so personal, for your blessed assurance! Thank you for the doctors, medicines, and therapies. I pray for each one you use in my life. Bless them, Lord.
So now I am off to go gentle into another day, leaning on you your everlasting arms and rejoicing in your presence. ❤ I love you, Lord! ❤ And always will! ❤

Spiritual Warfare On Medication

Lord, what a  fight. Such a stormy sea within. Billowing winds. Tossing waves. And I have no idea if this is a storm you want me to ride out instead of causing you to say, “O ye of little faith.” At least there’s a little. Enough to come to you in case this is not you, so that you can calm the sea… even rebuke it. And what if it is simply just happening… this scary fear… this fear to move… the fear of doing anything else until I get this straightened out. But what?? Straighten what out??

And there are my medications. They can ease anxiety, lift depression, and totally alter my mind. It’s hard sometimes to know the difference between what’s just getting the best of me, is explainable because of medicines, or is Spiritual Warfare. Soon doubt makes me question if you appreciate my brain being on these drugs. Yet I followed you in prayer over my health, my doctors, and trusting the doctors you gave me. I know you gift doctors and scientists the grace to allow comfort and healing. It’s my weary and fearful mind that I don’t understand. Which makes me think on Luke 5:31,

“And Jesus answering said unto them, They that are whole need not a physician; but they that are sick.”

My mind is not whole, nor a great deal of my body. My spine and neurological system alone are so sick that without the doctors and medicines you provide I would not be walking, standing, or even sitting without severe pain. Some days the chemicals are stronger than the pain and confusion. Other days the pain and confusion are nothing to contend with. In all of these days, I solely rely on you to work through whatever resources you provide, or simply to be my faithful compassionate companion.

Every line I write is a struggle to complete and not delete, partly because I do not want to make you look bad, and partly because I NEED to talk this out with you. I NEED to be able to come to you with even my fears, so that you can help me deal with them. Fear can be our enemy, but you can use it to draw us near. I choose to draw near. And as I do I cling to your Holy Word that tells me,

Be not afraid of sudden fear, neither of the desolation of the wicked, when it cometh.”
Proverbs 3:25 KJV

So I simply finish with choosing to embrace my fear, though I still don’t understand it. I choose to praise you with a song you have comforted me with time and time again because every word of it is true. Turn Your Eyes Upon Jesus.

I know that when I look full in your wonderful face that the things of earth will grow strangely dim in the light of your glory and grace. Your Word will not fail me. You promised! And I believe! ❤

Finding Treasure In You

Ministry and friends,
I never knew one day they’d be the same.
Friends in ministry,
I never knew I’d know so many by name.
My son and you,
I had a hope you would know each other.
You in my son,
I would have hope for no other.
Serving in joy,
I would not have thought went together.
Joy in serving,
I want that feeling to last forever.
Hope in faith,
I seek to hold onto you.
Faith in hope,
I know you hold onto me too.

9-21-11 Written by Gail Brookshire
(by the grace of God)

Things I’ve Heard While Reading You

Chariots, horses, and oxen too,
things I’ve heard while reading You.
Flowers, gardens, and vineyards grow,
each with a parable to learn and know.
Giants, ghosts, and angels who fly
make me want to know how and why.
A virgin, a carpenter, and a coming king
makes one want to hear the angels sing.
The wine, the dove, and a brother out of the grave
makes one glad He came to save.
The sweat, the cross, and the betrayal of friends,
Lord willing, makes one want to repent.

9-21-11 Written by Gail Brookshire
(by the grace of God)